The curtamous page
April 2005 Archived Notes
April
25, 2005 - Happy Monday to all! I hope everyone had themselves a good weekend, and are ready for another great week. Me? My weekend wasn't too bad, but I really didn't get a lot accomplished. Nothing new there... I spent more time doing work stuff that I would have hoped, as I was on call last week, but it wasn't too bad. I only got calls in the middle of the night three times. Those aren't too fun... This week I get to recover from all the excitement.
I did get to help the FDA Chair on Saturday with some yard work out at Ma/Pa Nelson's. Cleaned up some rose bushes and other stuff and neither of us ended up bleeding... much... Next time the FDA Chair may bring safety goggles. Good move... We ended up with a nice pile
of brush for the village to pick up...
No word from The President or AG on the success of the young AG's turkey hunt. The last I heard, Zumbo had the AG out on Sunday, so I don't think things turned out too successful, but any turkey hunt is a good hunt. I hope to have an update next week...
Speaking of turkey hunts, my season starts on Wednesday. Due to work concerns, I can't get out on Wednesday, but I "should" be out at the crack of dawn on Thursday... and probably Friday... and so on, until my empty tag gets put on the wall Sunday. Zumbo reports few gobbles on the ranch, so this may be a down year for us... we'll see...
Spent (or wasted) a fair amount of time watching the Packers draft this weekend. QB of the future is in house, and I think that's a reasonably good thing, but we'll have to hope our new defensive coordinator can up the level of play on that side of the ball or it could be a long year. Should be a great time as always.
Had a good Thursday night, as we had mass out at the mission church for my two aunts. A good crowd showed up, with cousins from Valdars and Sugurbush attending. The downside was I had to get back to work for 9pm to do some late night maintenance. Didn't get home until 2am, but things went well, so it could have been worse...
We have a winner!!! Last weeks question, "Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the
expected?" was correctly answered: "I have a clearly defined answer to this week's question. For anyone who has spent any time at all with the President, the only answer to this question is a definitive "YES." After all, what do you expect? - FM". The good old FM! I'm sure The President is looking forward to his visit. No word on last week's tussle between Hank and the FM... Here's this week's question:
If someone gives you a penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, where does the other penny go? Do you get change?
As always, please feel free to submit your answers in the
guestbook... Again, the best answer of the week gets an all expenses paid trip to The President's garage...
The FM was busy last week. He also gave me his yearly recap on the Denville BBall season. Have I mentioned that he's one of "those" fans? I'm sure you know what I mean. I'm still formulating my rebuttal. Too bad I can't share those
correspondences with you...
Possibly and oldie, and probably edited for our benefit, but its still a good one:
A
man decided to write a book about famous churches around the country. So, he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North.
On his first day, he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call." The man, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for. The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God. The man thanked the priest and went along his way.
Next stop was in Atlanta. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it. He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was. She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God. "O.K., thank you," said the man.
He then traveled to Indianapolis, Washington DC, Philadelphia, Boston, and New York. In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 per call" sign under it. The man, upon leaving New York decided to travel out mid west to see if western states had the same phone.
He arrived in Wisconsin, and, again, in the first church he entered, there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "40 cents per call." The man was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. "Father, I've traveled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in the east and south the price was $10,000 per call.
Why is it so cheap here?
The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Wisconsin now, son, it's a local call."
Gotta love it here in Wisconsin...
Fish Camp 2005 is sneaking up on us fast. With Mother's Day on Sunday, it may cut into some of the extended nature of the weekend, but we'll do our best. I hope to have some
stuff posted on the site this week.
Well, that's it for this week. With turkey season this week, I have Thursday and Friday off, so I
got 5 days of work to do in in only three. I should be done by noon... Before I go, a few words of wisdom for our junior members:
"There will always be death and taxes; however, death doesn't get worse every year." -- Unknown
Depends, doesn't it?
Until next time, take care...
As Red would say, “Keep your stick on the ice!”
curtamous
April
18, 2005 - Howdy folks! Quick update today, as work is already kicking my a$$, so lets get started...
Big news item #1! Zumbo scores again! Despite his claims that there were very few turkeys on the preserve this spring, Friday night Zumbo shows up on my doorstep and says we have to go to see The President. That's a pretty
scary statement, but it turns out Zumbo had a really nice Tom in the back with a 9 1/2 inch beard. We headed over and The President was quite impressed... We'll see this week if Zumbo's claim of a "barren turnkey wasteland" has any merit as the you AG tries to fill his tag starting Wednesday...
Big news item #2! Deer Hunt 2004 pics have been posted to the web site.
Check here... My favorite is "sleeping
beauty", but a close second is the extraction crew
pic. That pic has a certain individual that seems VERY white, and its not the camera...
Thankfully, I have a real dilemma concerning last week's contest. The question, "If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?", prompted a response from the FM, but he answered the question WITH ANOTHER QUESTION! What the heck do I do with that. And to top it off, our buddy Hank corrected the FM's whole theory, questioned evolution in general, AND placed dogs ahead of junior members... OK, he
definitely got the last one right, but still...
I'm stumped! I think it may be best if the FM and Hank show up at The President's garage and duke it out. The FM's dog can referee, as he seems to have pretty sound
judgment. Vegas currently has Hank listed as the favorite at a hefty 12-1. They also have a side line at 2-1 that the FM's dog has to drive him home... Hmmm...
I hope to have a report back next week... in the mean time, here's this week's question:
Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?
As always, please feel free to submit your answers in the
guestbook... Again, the best answer of the week gets an all expenses paid trip to The President's garage...
Holy crap, Fish Camp 2005 is like 17 days away! I got the email out last week and am working on finalizing the menu and the schedule... I've also had a request that the FM send up the FM-Junior to donate at the card table...
Here's a submission from the FDA Chair...
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.
"Careful ... CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD!
You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK!
Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!
Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY?
Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"
The wife stared at him. "What the hell is wrong with you?
You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving.
I wonder what the FDA Chair is getting at here...
Well, that's it for this week. Works awaits... Before I go, a few words of wisdom for our junior members:
"Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there." -- unknown
Hmmm... how astute...
Oh yeah, I
didn't hit any buildings this week, but our front lawn has been decorated
twice... I wonder how much dog do-do they took home on the bottom of their
shoes...
Until next time, take care...
As Red would say, “Keep your stick on the ice!”
curtamous
April
11, 2005 - Hello! How's everyone today? I hope all is well and everyone is ready for a good week... At least I hope its a good week... Last week was a long tough one, but we made it through, so here's hoping for more of the same... "That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger"... Wonder who came up with that one...
To start things off, I got a note from "Little Zumbo", the future
Admiral, last week. His girl was out visiting the week before and they took some time to visit the Big Apple. He sent her this note and pic from the trip:
Hey, Amanda and I just wanted to send along a picture someone took of us during our recent trip to New York City. Should bring a warm fuzzy feeling to you all, I'm sure.
Speaking of pics, I finally have The President's
pics from Deer Camp 2004 scanned up and ready. I should have them out on the web site soon...
Speaking of The President, I haven't heard if he made wood this past weekend or not. His senior staff certainly let him down big time, myself included, by not
prioritizing their life properly and making the trip with him northward. Even the best laid plans sometimes fail, but we'll make it up to him...
The FM sent me a note on a new fund raising effort last week:
The Prez bought a donkey from Zumbo for $100.00. Zumbo agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.
The next day Zumbo drove up and said, "Sorry Prez, but I have some bad news, the donkey died."
The Prez replied "Well then, just give me my money back."
Zumbo said, "Can't do that. I went and spent it already."
The Prez said, "OK then, just unload the donkey."
Zumbo asked, "What ya gonna do with him?"
Prez: "I'm going to raffle him off."
Zumbo: "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!"
Prez: "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he is dead."
A month later Zumbo met up with The Prez and asked,
"What happened with that dead donkey?"
Prez: "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a piece and made a profit of $898.00."
Zumbo: "Didn't anyone complain?"
Prez: "Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.
Hmmm... sounds like a plan!
And I could DEFINITELY see The President pulling it off!
For the second week in a row, we had no respondents to our question of the week.
Last week's question, "If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff?" produced no response. However, we did have a new response from THE PREVIOUS week's question. While I cannot award a prize for such a late response, I'm sure if someone pulls up to The President's garage with an Ark, The President will
oblige.
Despite the lack of participation, we'll try this again. Here's this week's question:
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
If we don't get a response from THIS question, we may have to quit.
This one is tailor made for The Hawk. As always, please feel free to submit your answers in the
guestbook... Again, the best answer of the week gets an all expenses paid trip to The President's garage...
Heard from the Sturgeon General last week. He was concerned about the SEC-Transportation's marital status. I told him he may as well be, but nothing more than that...
Saw the FDA Chair this weekend, and he report's that the SEC-D'Fence has been accepted into Pharm School. Somewhere in
Illinoiz... Called the Buffalo Pharm School or something... Well, anyways, it gets us that much closer to PREMIUM hunting land...
Sounds like the FDA Chair is building a house this summer... and he's hired the SEC-W/M's company to build it... and he's asked that the SEC-W/M
help build it... YES, he must be losing it... Good luck with that...
Speaking of the SEC-W/M, he stopped over on Saturday to get some help figuring out how to finish putting up trim
in the Mayor's new dinning room. Seemed to me that the problem was unsolvable, at least without The President's help. So we had a couple beers and I sent him back... I didn't hear the rescue squad, so I don't think she killed him, but you never know...
Fish Camp 2005 is less than a month away! Can you believe that? I have a draft menu on the FDA Chair's desk, but nothing is finalized yet. I hope to get an email out this week to start putting together a schedule...
Spring Turkey Season starts this week, and Zumbo will no doubt have his trophy in the freezer by noon Wednesday. I am hoping to go with him, but its NOT looking good. Good luck Zumbo!
I watched some of Pope John Paul II's funeral on Friday, and it was pretty spectacular.
Not a bad way to go out. Anyway, I thought this little story might be appropriate:
A Bored Member, planning a trip to the Holy Land, was aghast when he found it would cost fifty dollars an hour to rent a boat on the Sea of Galilee.
"Holy Crap," he said, "Up North it wouldn't be more than $20."
"That might be true," said the travel agent, "but you have to take into account that the Sea of Galilee is water on which our Lord himself walked."
"Well, at $50 an hour for a boat," said the Bored Member, "it's no wonder he walked!"
Well, that's what I got for this week. Before I go, a few words of wisdom for our junior members:
"A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities, and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties." -- Harry S. Truman
Sometimes that's a hard thing to put into practice, but its excellent words of advice...
Until next time, take care...
As Red would say, “Keep your stick on the ice!”
curtamous
April
4, 2005 - Well... let's see... its Monday... I'm tired... this whole time change thing must have me messed up... this update could be short...
The highlite of the week? April Fools Day evening... kinda... right up until my truck and garage had a little disagreement... went out after work, and instead of just having a couple, I had a couple quite a few times. Had a lot of fun, and I created a project for myself on Saturday. It all worked out...
As always, The President was there for me. He stopped by and checked out the situation and gave me very sage advice. I then had to make TWO stops to The President's garage AND managed to make it home OK. All is well in Denville!
For those of you concerned, junior (SEC-HHS) finally made it home on Tuesday last week. Actually, it was very early
morning on Wednesday. Seems the car problems were a little worse than they thought, and the bill was a LOT worse. But they mad it home safe...
Talked to the SEC-W/M like six times last week. He's on task to put up trim in the Mayors remodeled dinning room, and he just can't seem to GET-R-DUN. Now he's shooting for Wednesday.
Speaking of the SEC-W/M, sounds like he's going to bail on wood making this weekend. Thanks to another weekend of B-Ball, the
Chief and I won't make it either. PLEASE let The President know if you can show, or he may have to cancel. THAT wouldn't be good.
SEC-Transportation and his beautiful fiancé stopped over Sunday to borrow a sander as his is missing. If you have his, please call 1-800-WHO-CARES and report it...
ZERO entries for last week's question of the week. Our question, "Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?" didn't even elicit ONE response. I'm disappointed. Are you people stupid? Does The President have to do everything? Do you realize how exclusive our prize package is? Well, lets try it again. Here's this week's question:
If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff?
As always, please feel free to submit your answers in the
guestbook... Again, the best answer of the week gets an all expenses paid trip to The President's garage...
I saw the FM this weekend, but didn't get a chance to talk to him. I'm guessing he's still avoiding me... I get that a lot... anyway, he and the tribe are back from vacation. Junior-Junior was over yesterday causing trouble, so that's back to normal. I got a postcard from the FM during his vacation, but I can't figure out how to post it. Plus, I'm not sure he'd want me to. He also submitted this week's words of wisdom below. Hopefully we'll hear more from him this week.
As you all know, our blessed father Pope John Paul II passed away Saturday. I hope this isn't
sacrilegious, but personally, I don't have a lot of doubt as to where he ended up, so I didn't spend a lot of time praying for him. I'll save my prayers for the guy who has to try to replace him. Anyway, in his honor, we'll forgo the usual joke and use this nice little story
instead:
THE DEVIL AND THE DUCK
There was a little boy visiting his grandparents on their farm. He was given a slingshot to play with out in the woods. He practiced in the woods, but he could never hit the target. Getting a little discouraged, he headed back for dinner.
As he was walking back he saw Grandma's pet duck. Just out of impulse, he let the slingshot fly, hit the duck square in the head, and killed it. He was shocked and grieved. In a panic, he hid the dead duck in the wood pile, only to see his sister watching! Sally had seen it all, but she said nothing.
After lunch the next day Grandma said, "Sally, let's wash the dishes." Sally said, "Grandma, Johnny told me he wanted to help in the kitchen." Then she whispered to him, "Remember the duck?" So Johnny did the dishes.
Later that day, Grandpa asked if the children wanted to go fishing and Grandma said, "I'm sorry but I need Sally to help make supper." Sally just smiled and said, " Well that's all right because Johnny told me he wanted to help." She whispered again, "Remember the duck?" So Sally went fishing and Johnny stayed to help.
After several days of Johnny doing both his chores and Sally's he finally couldn't stand it any longer. He came to Grandma and confessed he had killed the duck. Grandma knelt down, gave him a hug, and said, "Sweetheart, I know. You see, I was standing at the window and I saw the whole thing. But because I love you, I forgave you. I was just wondering how long you would let Sally make a slave of you."
Thought for the day and every day thereafter: Whatever is in your past, whatever you have done -- and the devil keeps throwing it up in your face (lying, debt, fear, hatred, anger, unforgiveness, bitterness, etc.) Whatever it is, you need to know that God was standing at the window and He saw the whole thing, He has seen your whole life. He wants you to know that He loves you and that you are forgiven. He's just wondering how long you will let the devil make a slave of you.
The great thing about God is that when you ask for forgiveness, He not only forgives you, but He forgets - It is by God's Grace and Mercy that we are saved. Go ahead and make the difference in someone's life today.
One of the Pope's themes in service was forgiveness, so I thought this fitted in quite well... And its a great message... go out and forgive a junior member today... Not that any one of them could hit and kill a duck...
One more topic... A happy belated birthday to that beautiful, old-fashion swilling, little Irish girl the FDA Chair married. I hope she had a great day! And this Friday is a VERY, VERY, VERY special day for the BBC. Don't miss out on this date! Its a BIG one...
Well, that's what I got for this week. Before I go, a few words of wisdom for our junior members, submitted by the FM:
"Some people drink from the fountain of knowledge, others just gurgle." -- Unknown
And then we have our junior members that are known to pee in the pool...
Until next time, take care...
As Red would say, “Keep your stick on the ice!”
curtamous
Last Updated: Wednesday, April 30, 2008
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