The curtamous page
November 2004 Archived Notes
November
29, 2004 - WE HAVE A BUCK DOWN! WE HAVE A BUCK DOWN!!! I wasn't sure how to open today's update, but I figured the high pitched cry of the young AG over our radios was the most appropriate way to open today's diatribe after a two week hiatus. That was the cry we heard not once, BUT TWICE, as our AG, the pride of the President's eye, connected on TWO fine bucks
during this 2004 Deer Hunt. Our young Buck slayer took a nice spike north of 64 at the BBC headquarters shortly before noon on Sunday of opening weekend, and then connected again on a 5 pointer
(with a cracked rack & should have been a 7 pointer) on a drive back home on Friday. He may have taken a third had he been properly guarding The President and VP on another drive, but that's another story...
As I'm sure you can imagine, Deer Camp 2004 was another outstanding event and complete success. The addition of venison this year only makes it better. Most of the stories will be covered in our 2004 newsletter, but maybe I can
highlight a few things that don't break any "North of 64" guidelines...
We had a record attendance with an amazing 16 at the BBC, and thankfully, the new bunkhouse performed well up to expectations. The "special" guests that attended were welcomed with open arms, as well as SHOCK and ASTONISHMENT! The food was, as always, spectacular, with the special treat provided by the President's mother, boiled shrimp cooked Ma Nelson's style, really topping off a GREAT menu. The hunting was
better than recent years as a few deer were seen, but the sign was definitely more plentiful, keeping hunters interested. Success by the young AG as detailed above, was a particular
highlight that he and the rest of the BBC will long remember. (If we should forget, I'm sure he'll remind us...)
Half the team of Jack and Ass connected on opening morning with another nice buck, and I even
received a special call from Jack the Cat... Beyond that, behavior was very good, and new members were inducted into the BBC during a very special Saturday night Bored Meeting... the rest I will leave for our
newsletter, scheduled with release in Q1 2005.
Speaking of literature, we were even published this year in the local paper... a nice article, while somewhat vague due to "North of 64" affects,
definitely conveyed the spirit of Bob's Buck Camp, even if some details were a bit sketchy...
Also, the term SSA was adopted after FREQUENT usage... A great time was had by all, and I'm already anticipating Deer Camp 2005.
So, did anything else happen over the last two weeks? Not really... we did have the annual Nelson Thanksgiving gathering in
Bellevue which was real nice... Packers did well last week in an exciting game, but we won't mention the lack of a Rose Bowl bid for our favorite team in our state's capitol.
You'd think that after two weeks, I'd have a lot of info, but its just not the case...
Most of the stuff is either covered under the "North of 64" ruling or will wait for the newsletter... Oh well, if I missed something, drop me a line or put it in the
guestbook yourself... It was an AWESOME
vacation!!! With Deer Camp over for now, here's one for our next season:
The Prez and the FM are fishing, but they haven’t caught anything all day. Then, another fisherman walks by with a huge load of fish. They ask him "excuse me, but where did you get all those fish?"
The other fisherman replies,” If you just go down the steam until the water isn't salty, there are a ton of hungry fish."
They thank him and go on their way. 15 minutes later, the Prez says to the FM "fill the bucket up with water and see if the water is salty."
He dips the bucket in the stream and drinks some. "Nope. Still salty."
30 minutes later, the Prez asks him to check again.
"Nope, still salty." One hour later they check again. "Nope. Still salty."
"This isn't good," the Prez finally says. "We have been walking for almost two hours and the water is still salty!"
"I know," says the FM, "And the bucket is almost empty!"
What do you
think the President's response to that would be? SSA?
That's all I have time for today, but, before I go, a few words of wisdom for our junior members:
"You aren't drunk if you can lie on the ground without having to hold on...." -- Dean Martin
That Dean must have been a BBC member from
way back...
Until next time, take care, and have a GREAT week!
As Red would say, “Keep your stick on the ice!”
curtamous
November
15, 2004 - Well folks, its here, Deer Camp 2004!!! In 3 short days Bob's Buck Camp will have its opening for the 2004 season, and in 5 short days, the season will commence. Have I ever mentioned that this is my FAVORITE time of the year!?!?!
Anyone paying attention knows I was on vacation all last week, and what a week it was! OK, the fact that I wasn't at work made ANYTHING I did great, but it was a good week none the less, even though it FLEW by...
My "project" list was about two pages long, and to be honest, by Wednesday I was so damn tired, I almost was missing work... I hunted, did yard work, hunted, built bunks, hunted, made wood, hunted, finished the deck, hunted, etc... Did I mention I hunted? We'll get to that later... Anyway, I got a lot of stuff done, but only half of what I planned on... oh well, it was great NOT being at work.
The hunting? Not so good... Spent a fair amount of time in the woods, but saw little, and had no shots. I hunted with Zumbo most of the week, and even though you'd think that would do it, even for a hunter like me, I only saw 6 deer in what I would consider a pretty nice stand. Zumbo on the other hand, arrowed a nice 6-pointer on Wednesday, which was good, cause I could help him get it out of the woods and hung... very nice deer, but not the big guy... well, he's still after that one...
I headed north on Saturday to meet the President and get ready for Deer Camp, and I was able to get the bunk house pretty much ready to go. It now has 4 bunks and power... the boys will have it pretty nice in there... When the President showed up after lunch with the first lady, we took a walk and checked out deer stands, but we didn't have much time as he had a commitment in Crivitz later that afternoon...
Which leads me to, Happy 50th to Dick and Dee!!! They celebrated 50 years together this past weekend... Great couple!!! Here's hoping for many more...
Back to the bunk house... if the boys don't like it, here's what they get next year:
Well, other than a bad Badger game in Michigan and a great Packer game in Green Bay, that's all I have for now... Remember, Deer Camp 2004 opens on Thursday, so make sure you have everything.
Here's a link to the menu and checklists, and use the
guestbook to get messages around if you need...
One more... Since we'll have multiple birthdays this year, we wanted to request a special
cake, but make mine Miller:
OK, one more "one more"... Here's one dedicated to the happy couple... This one reminded the FM of Dee:
Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial
small town up north, the prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand. She was a grand-motherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She replied, "Why yes Mr. Jones, I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk behind their backs. You also think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to anything more than a two bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The attorney was stunned, not knowing anything else to do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
Again she replied, "Why yes I do, I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention, he has cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife."
The defense attorney almost had a heart attack.
The Judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice said, " If either of you bastards ask her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for contempt."
Thanks for that one FM...
That's it! For everyone except the FM and SEC-D'fence, I'll see you in Deer Camp... But, before I go, a few words of wisdom for our junior members:
"There are those who say it can't be done, and are content to leave it at that. And then there are those who find a way." -- Ralph Marston
That's right, and
sometimes its "Bob's" way...
Don't forget, next week is Deer Hunting 2004, so you won't see a new update for two weeks...
Until next time, take care, and have a GREAT week!
As Red would say, “Keep your stick on the ice!”
curtamous
November
8, 2004 - A Monday night update! Well, I've never done this before... Well, day one of my vacation week has netted 4+ hours of bowhunting... Score: Deer 1 curtamous 0
I saw NOTHING! Big surprise, huh? Well, I did get the bunk beds completed today at least, as well as a nice shopping spree at Menards...
I don't have much to report, other than the obvious... I'm on vacation... I did get to see The President Sunday when we headed out to Zumbos to sight in guns. The President, AG, SEC-Transportation, Zumbo and myself zeroed in our weapons. We're ready... I also helped the FDA Chair bag up his kraut, so we're ready on that front as well... Other than that, I had a SHIT week at work. I was at the office until after midnight THREE nights! I'm all for work, but not when it gets in the way of my real life... not that I have much of a life, but I like it... except of course for the work and home stuff... ;-)
I really hadn't planned on an update this week, but I checked my mail and luckily the FM made it into work and provided plenty of material for me. To start off, the FM gives his yearly Denmark High School Football Review:
You asked for it, you got it.
In summary the 2004 football season should be considered a great success. The turnaround from 2-7 last season to 7-4 this year could be considered a huge turnaround, and a definite sign that the program is headed in the right direction. Now, I should just stop there. But, I'm the FM, so I can't.
This season's squad combined probably contained more overall football talent than DHS has seen in at least five years. I'm not much of one to blast coaches or officials, so, well.....all I can say is that I sure do miss Jerry Leiterman.
The three conference losses came at a combined 15 points. Sturgeon Bay beat Denmark in conference play 21-14, while gaining 65 yards of TOTAL offense in the game. The debacle at Kewaunee (a 10-9 loss on a last-minute field goal in the rain) was a heartbreaker The playoff loss to SBay (14-7) was, again, a case of Denmark turnovers and ill-timed penalties (please note that I have not once mentioned play-calling.) The Denmark-Luxemburg game, a 28-21 victory for LC, was one of the best high school football games I've seen in years. Denmark could have won that one, too, but.....no, I'm not going there.
There's lot more I could say, but it's probably best-suited for tavern or deer camp discussion. Let' just say that I'm very proud of the entire squad, and FM Junior held his own at center and d-tackle, and only got flagged once all season-a pretty impressive stat for an FM offspring!
For now, that is all.
Hoops season begins Nov. 27....bring it on, baby!
FM
Nice work! Sounds like he has it pretty much right on the mark, but obviously he's holding quite a bit back... Hopefully, we'll see him in a tavern, because we all know he might not EVER make it to Deer Camp again. Speaking of which, here's his latest excuse provided by none other than Dixie LaRue!
To BBC:
As you may or not be aware, the FM regrets to inform you that he has been dispatched by the Senate Arms Committee to clear up a little border dispute down San Diego way, thereby disrupting his planned attendance at Deer Camp 2004. He would like to relay, however, that any (hunting) camp member is welcome to fill his tag, if the opportunity so arises.
On behalf of the FM, I extend wishes of good luck and safe hunting to the entire BBC congregate. You will be in the FM's thoughts, please keep him in yours as he sacrifices his own interests to aid in keeping your freedoms alive.
All my best,
Dixie LaRue
Chief Special Assistant to the FM
In other words, he has another little trip planned with the Mrs. FM. Good luck to them both! Finally, the FM provided a little update on BBC members... First off, we have a little story about Jack and Ass:
Jack and Ass go camping and pack a cooler with sandwiches and beer. After three days of walking, they arrive at a great spot but realize they've forgotten a bottle opener. Jack turns to Ass and says, "You've gotta go back and get the opener or else we have no beer."
"No way," says Ass. "By the time I get back, you will have eaten all the food."
"I promise I won't," says Jack. "Just hurry!"
Nine full days pass and there's still no sign of Ass. Exasperated and starving, Jack digs into the sandwiches.
Suddenly, Ass pops out from behind a rock and yells, "I knew it! I'm not f-cking going!"
Well, I guess he's got those two down pat.. next, he has a little story about a fishing trip he and The President took:
So, the Prez and FM are out fishing. The FM baits his hook with a big old nightcrawler. Well, before you know it, he's got something BIG! He reels it in and lo & behold, it's a bottle of beer! FM asks The Prez for the opener, opens it, and WHOOSH out pops a GENIE!!! The Genie says you have one wish....you know the story. FM thinks... and finally says "I want this whole lake to be beer instead of water." The Genie grants the wish and, as the water turns to beer, fish start jumping out all over the place and several land right in the boat. Very pleased with himself , FM grins at the Prez and waits for his approval. The Prez gives FM a disgusted look and says " You DUMB ASS!!! Now we gotta pee in the boat!"
You know, you can just hear The President saying that too...
That's it! Back to vacation time! Hopefully, I'll have a update next week, the last before Deer Camp 2004!!! But, before I go, a few words of wisdom for our junior members:
"If guns cause crime, then pencils cause misspelled words." -- unknown
That's a little info for you democrats...
Until next time, take care, and have a GREAT week!
As Red would say, “Keep your stick on the ice!”
curtamous
November
1, 2004 - Happy Monday all, and welcome to
November, the GREATEST month of the year! Well, I hope its a happy Monday... I had high hopes for not being at work today, but those plans feel thru once I realized I was on call this week. That means this will be a week from hell... That's how work has been in general anyway, so nothing new there...
Well, The President, AG, Chief Inspector and I had a nice time up north for our yearly extended weekend. The weather didn't cooperate as we were pretty damp, and The President had to make a trip to have his toe checked out which limited our hunting a little, but overall, it was a great time to be away. Zero results on the small game front as the weather kept the squirrels
quiet and the grouse tucked in pretty deep. We saw a few, but never got any shots off... To make up for the poor hunting, we had some great meals and generous libations... Hard to believe, huh?
We did manage to get some work done on the bunk house, as the electrical is roughed in and all the sheeting is on the walls. Two sets of hands weren't enough to tackle the ceiling sheets, but hopefully we can get that done in two weeks. We're also hoping to get the bunks prepped and ready for Deer Camp as well... we'll see...
Speaking of Deer Camp, can you believe its ONLY 18 DAYS AWAY!!! That's right, you better get ready!!!
The President and I are hoping to make the trip north again in two weeks, the weekend of the 13th-14th, to prep deer stands and finish more on the bunk house. But we need more hands! Let me know if anyone else can make it north that weekend. As always, it will be a good time!
What else is going on? Well, the Packers have climbed back to .500 ball, so the season should stay interesting unless they go into another slump. With a bye week coming up, they should be well rested and
recuperated so they can go out and thump the ViQueens. The Badgers had a good weekend with a bye and still climbing in the national polls due to higher ranked teams losing! Way to go NC!!! A final football note, the Denmark HS team lost in the playoffs to a decent SB team. I think they should have won this game as well... they seem to be slight
underachievers, as all there losses this year were games they "could"
have won... Maybe the FM can give us a year end review and analysis?
Did I mention Deer Camp is 18 day away?!?! Holy crap!
The FM forwarded me this tidbit... pretty funny stuff:
You remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when "Hollywood Squares" game show responses were spontaneous and clever, not scripted and (often) dull, as they are now.
Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.
Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a Man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
Q. According to Cosmo, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get Older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love You"?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.
Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
Q. Can boys join the CampFireGirls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
Q. According to Ann Landers, is their anything wrong with getting into the Habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet
Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and Laugh
The Squares used to have some pretty funny dudes on... Paul Lynde was always a favorite...
That's it! Once again, work beacons... I have next week off, so I don't know if I'll get to do an update or not... If you don't see anything by Tuesday, expect the worse and amuse yourselves on the
guestbook... I do hope to get the Deer
Camp 2004 Menu posted this week though...
Before I go, here are some words of wisdom for the junior members:
"A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul." --George Bernard Shaw
In other words, don't forget to get out and vote tomorrow!!!
Until next time, take care, and have a GREAT week!
As Red would say, “Keep your stick on the ice!”
curtamous
Last Updated: Friday, January 30, 2009
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